Sexuality education

This letter was sent to ST Forum but was not published.

I refer to Ms Angeline Wong Hui Wei's letter ("Based Sexuality Education on facts, not opinions",http://www.straitstimes.com/premium/forum-letters/story/base-sexuality-education-facts-not-opinion-20150225 25 Feb)

Sexuality education is a process of acquiring knowledge and skills, and forming attitudes, beliefs and values with regard to human sexuality.

The MOE Sexuality Education helps students understand the physiological, social and emotional changes they experience as they mature, develop healthy and rewarding relationships, and make wise, informed and responsible decisions on sexuality matters. Sexuality Education covers the following dimensions of a person’s sexuality:

• Physical: Physical sexual maturation and intimacy, the physiology of sex and human reproduction;
• Emotional: Sexual attitudes and feelings towards self and others;
• Social: Sexual norms and behaviour and their legal, cultural and societal implications; and
• Ethical: Values and moral systems related to sexuality.

Issues of sexuality would involve value judgments. Parents as the primary care-givers, are responsible for the health and moral values of their children.
The adjective 'moral' is concerned with the principles of right and wrong behaviour.

Under the Singapore Law, it is illegal to have sex with a person under the age of 16 with or without the minor’s consent. Sex with a person below 16 is called “Statutory Penetration of a Minor Under 16″, S376A, Penal Code. If the minor is a girl below 14, the offence is called statutory rape.

Is it morally right to engage in underage sex when there is a law in place to protect our young?

What is wrong with delayed sexual activity before marriage? Our children and youth grow up in a rapidly changing world where globalisation and technological advancements expose them to a wide range of influences from around the world. Sexuality education helps them to be equipped to protect themselves from sexual advances and abuse, and avoid sexual experimentation and activities that lead to problems related to teenage pregnancies and STIs/HIV. 

Ms Wong has shared her personal opinions advocating for underage sex, preferred use of contraceptives rather than abstinence and her interpretation of morality which does not help our young to consider the dire consequences of underage sex.
As she has shown in her opinions, no one person can be void of opinions when implementing sexuality education simply because we are humans. As such, vendors affliated to any faith or not is irrelevant as long as they adhere to these conditions:

• External provider’s philosophy is aligned to MOE’s stand and policies on Sexuality Education.
• External provider does not preach their or any religious stand in the sexuality education programmes that they conduct.

Not enough credit given to teaching abstinence

ACCORDING to the article on Feb 9 ("Teen births drop to 20-year low"), over the years, the number of babies born to teenage girls aged 19 and below has dropped significantly, along with the number of abortions by girls aged below 20.

With no statistics given for the causes, the reasons cited for the drop include using contraception to prevent teenage pregnancy.

Practising abstinence before marriage was not proposed as one of the factors contributing to the drop, as if it were an impossible task for our teenagers.

One of the key messages of sexuality education by the Ministry of Education is practise abstinence before marriage, as it is the best protection against sexually transmitted infections and unwanted pregnancies.

Casual sex can harm and hurt the teens and their loved ones. Therefore, only by practising abstinence before marriage can teenage pregnancies and abortions be ruled out.

As an educator who has worked with children and teenagers for 15 years, I feel we tend to underestimate our young people's capacity for self-control.

Thus, we tend to promote contraception rather than abstinence. It is no surprise that an increasing number of teenagers think that it is normal for them to have sex ("Underage sex more common, say social workers"; Feb 9).

My experience has shown that youth who are taught abstinence before marriage from a young age, and have also been given much family support, learn the value of loving themselves by not engaging in premarital sex.

Therefore, we should inform, encourage and support our teenagers in practising self-control. After all, it is a virtue that can take them far in life.

Born 'untouchable', she now touches lives

AS A woman born with brittle bones, I regret the misconceptions concerning people with special needs ("Very premature babies face serious risks" by Dr Yik Keng Yeong; Tuesday).

When I was born, I was "untouchable" because my bones would break at every touch. I could very well have been labelled a "grossly handicapped child" facing long-term severe disability and dependence.

My life could have been terminated if my parents had received such a prognosis. But because medical technology was not so advanced in the 1970s, I had a chance at life.

Through parental support, medical treatment and personal determination to excel, I am now an educator with the ability to impact lives.

I would like to lend my voice to the voiceless - the many unborn babies deemed to have no right to live and no future simply because they have medical defects - at a time when medical advances can be used to maximise their potential rather than strike them off from human society.

The selective abortion of unborn children with medical defects is an indication of how people can fail to recognise the inherent dignity and value of people with special needs.

What about people who have disabilities later in life? Are they no longer valuable as people?

I am greatly heartened by what Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong said recently at an event to mark the 50th anniversary of the SPD ("The disabled can contribute to society: PM Lee"; Nov 28).

He said: "Our society should value every person, no matter who he is, what he was born with or without, because every person matters to us. These are the basic principles that should guide us as we build a fair and just society."

To gain a better understanding of how people with special needs and their families live their lives with passion and meaning, I encourage everyone to talk to them or, better still, volunteer with the SPD or any similar organisation.

"Very premature babies face serious risks" by Dr Yik Keng Yeong

IT IS hard to disagree that advances in paediatric neonatology have allowed the survival of very premature babies ("Flawed rationale for 24-week rule on abortions" by Mr Darius Lee, Dec 22; and "Concept of foetal viability too subjective" by Mr Edmund Leong Meng Tsi, last Thursday).  

Life indeed is sacrosanct, but a reasonable discourse on what constitutes life and the viability and survivability of in-utero products of conception at different stages of development must include long-term morbidity studies of very premature babies.  

Let's take babies born prematurely at 23 weeks - one week before the current bone of contention for legal abortions in Singapore.  

Even with months of intense paediatric care in the best hospitals, about half will perish. Those who survive face very high risk of physical handicaps including cerebral palsy.  

If they survive the first two years, there is also cumulative morbidity as they become young adults with increased learning disabilities, poor motor skills and attention deficit syndromes.  

It is sad handling infertile couples, but nobody I know prefers having a grossly handicapped child to being childless.  

Doctors cannot determine what an in-utero being wants - to be born with all risks attached or to be unborn, this being an unscientific question to be answered only by moralists.  

Yet, from all the official Advance Medical Directives that have been signed and the unofficial opinions gathered from patients, it seems that for those who can choose, death is preferable to long-term severe disability and dependence.

Acceptance

Tried not to cry.

Or at least see how long I can tahan.

When You spoke through her that I, like many others, have an acceptance issue about my family, myself and I think after that, it must have been extended to friends or anyone...

I was shattered.

The wall around me just crumbled down, literally.
How could I not have known or realised that?
I don't need and I should never be ashamed of my father, my younger than me step-mother, my 3 step-siblings for they are all made in Your image.
I thank You that I have moved from 'hatred' towards them before receiving You to now learning to communicate with each of them.
You know it's not always easy, BUT You know I can do more for You.
And this is the purpose of my coming to You, deeper, having the courage to bare myself, to learn more about myself from You, to better RELATE to my family for I am reminded that I'm the only light for the time being.
I wanna be that light for You, to open the floodgates of salvation to my whole family, Lord!
She told me her testimony.
It's through small steps of obedience to You that salvation came to her parents!
I wanna claim that for my family, Lord!
So, it's nothing about me, I have already been set free by You, of the past, for the present and the future.
I can love cos You are Love.
I am loved cos You first loved me.
Accept that Lord, You gave me this family and I thank You for it.
Accept that I am born in this family for a purpose.
Accept that I have a physical condition that I can't change but I definitely can do my part in maximizing to my fullest potential with You, for You have made me.
I am fearfully and wonderfully made and my soul knows that very well.
Will I trade a new body for not knowing You?
No, I rather be me, knowing how loved I am, how much I can give to many others.
Never about me anymore.
You have taken care of that.