Society accepts every person but not every action

This letter was sent to ST Forum but was not published.

I read the article "Record 28,000 gather at Hong Lim Park for annual Pink Dot rally" on Jun 13 with much grief.

Pink Dot promotes the "freedom to love" regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity.

I know of people who led homosexual lifestyles due to factors like broken families, being molested or sexually abused when they were young or later on in life or due to other unfortunate circumstances. As a result, many struggle in this lifestyle. Internal more than external barriers prohibit these individuals from leading a life that sees love and acceptance in the proper context.

Many walk out of this lifestyle only when they come face-to-face with the underlying issues that traumatised them and deal with these issues with much courage. 

Love comes with great responsibility, both to self and to society.

During the Pink Dot rally, Mr Alvin Tan, an HIV-positive gay man and transgender Christopher Khor talked about issues such as social acceptance of homosexuality. 

Alvin and Christopher are precious individuals like any of us. We don't and we shouldn't look at the worth of any person based on his family background, profession, social status, personality, sexual orientation or any other factors.

Society accepts every individual but not actions that lead to undesirable consequences.  

Of the 428 new HIV cases acquired via sexual transmission in 2013, heterosexual transmission accounted for 40 per cent of infections while homosexual and bisexual transmission accounted for 54 per cent of the cases.

How does the society support people who are struggling with sexual orientation and gender identity issues, especially those whose health are affected as a result of these struggles?

For example, how do we help a person who is suicidal? Do we accept him by granting him his decision to kill himself or do we journey with him by helping him to overcome the challenges and thereby prevent a tragedy from happening?

More organisations should be set up to help people who struggle with sexual orientation and gender identity issues. 

On an individual level, let us seek to understand their struggles and not be quick to offer solutions that do not help them. 

It is only then that we can create a society that upholds the worth and dignity of every individual even when we cannot accept all behaviours and lifestyles that do not serve the public good.